Tickets cannot be refunded unless the event is cancelled or found to be more of a joke than Donald Trump’s hair or policies.
Women rated 8 or below will not be served at the bar. They should ask either a male companion to buy them drinks, or attempt to make themselves more appealing.
Trump in the Park reserves the right to eject anyone at any point, for any small-minded reason they think of.
Those wishing to scale the wall without a ticket do so at their own risk. itison accepts no responsibility for skint knees.
By entering the site, you agree that your tent may, at any point, be destroyed to make way for yet another golf course.
itison will not be held responsible if Trump winning brings about the apocalypse.
We thought that The Donald's whole campaign might be an elaborate April Fools' prank (fingers crossed!) but all that we can say for certain is that Trump is that not taking over T in the Park... gotcha!